Hopelessly Optimistic

Have you ever noticed that every theme song from a 1980's TV show is hopelessly optimistic? Here are a few:

"As long as we've got each other we've got the world spinning right in our hands"
"Every time I turn around I see the girl that turns my world around"
"Theme music playing from Hill Street Blues...it's instrumental but it still ends in a Major key!"

What a happy decade. I'm thrilled to have grown up in it.

Sometimes I feel like everyone I know has a fantastic life. Even people on radio shows that I don't know have fantastic lives. I start thinking "What do you do to get that?" and begin the Comparison/Criticism cycle. After a few futile minutes I realize that I am blessed too, as much or more than most people I know, and definitely more than most people I don't (like, 96% of the world). It all depends on focus. I could complain that I have a backside on which you could easily project movies; that my husband just spent two weekends on a roof and is ready to jump right in to Weekend Three: Well-Digging; that my kids are so energetic they run circles around me; that my calling necessitates driving all over the stake with a wee baby; or that we had to pay a back tax bill and thus deplete our emergency fund.

OR, I could be grateful that: I'm not suffering for want of food; I have a spouse who is so hard-working and unselfish with is time (and back); that my kids are so energetic, imaginative, healthy, and happy; that I have a calling where I can see long-lost friends in the stake; and that we had plenty in our emergency fund to pay said back tax bill.

Beyond that, I have friends and family and the gospel. Shoot, what more do you want?

"You want to be where you can see your troubles are all the same - You wanna go where everybody knows your name."

Genealogy, I Am Doing It!

Genealogy is the BIGGEST thrill. Most people don't really get that feeling until they're, let us say, 73. I started getting the Family History bug around 13, about 60 years too early. The only good part about starting young is that you can get much more information because your relatives haven't all died yet! Even though I end up spending much more time on it than I really have, I feel like it's an eternal work - a work that REALLY matters, unlike so much of what we do in this life.

Right now I've decided to start working on descendancy instead of ascendancy (that is, descendants instead of ancestors.) My grandparents and their generation have done most of my ascendancy work. At least, as much as can be done without lots of money, professional genealogists, and world travel. Descendancy work is much harder, in my opinion, because their birth and death records are protected by privacy laws, while your ancestors' vital records are now public. It's very rewarding, though, to find a cousin and communicate about your common family. I've met a few cousins who are shirt-tail relatives, to say the least, but they are still FAMILY. You have an instant connection - the same feeling I have when I meet someone who is a member of the church. Even if it's my first time meeting them there's immediately a foundation to build on. The creepy thing is when they start sending pictures, and you see yourself, or your parents, or your grandparents, in that person's features.

I'm also lucky to have an outrageously enormous family. Not my immediate family - just one sister - but my parents both had lots of siblings, whose parents had lots of siblings, and everybody keeps having kids. Then you can start to factor in step-relations, or in-laws, or in-laws of in-laws...gets pretty messy.

Most of my ancestors hail from Scandanavia. That's wonderful, of course, but I get the sinking feeling that learning to speak Swedish may be in my future. Worse things could happen.

And speaking of my enormous family...our Sweet Baby Hunter Bunter is calling to me. It's not a cooing, "come talk to me, Mom" cry, it's a "get me OUT this crib before I blow up!" type of cry. Better go.

A Big Post about Disney World

Now, you've all had your fair warning! But after a sort of lengthy discussion about Walt Disney World with some friends today, I decided to post my feelings, thoughts, comments about WDW for their benefit. I won't be offended if you don't read this. It's still good for me. Be prepared to think I'm a total psycho by the end of this post. (Or MORE of a total psycho.)

The question that was posed to me was: "Why do you love Disney World so much?" This was actually a really difficult question. It shouldn't be - goodness knows, I think about WDW enough - but the real REASON behind why I love it so much is something I haven't much considered. I just took it for granted that I do. It's hard to describe exactly why, so instead I'll list some things I love ABOUT WDW and then maybe it will help me figure out why. (It's good for me to do this. I should probably examine why I have the passions and interests I do, just for an existential exercise. )

1. It has a fantastic "feeling" about it. It's hard to describe this part. It's an atmosphere, sometimes described as magical, that's created to make you feel happy. I know it isn't a "real" place; that is, the whole thing has been made to specifications, but the feeling you get is definitely real, and very positive.

2. People are on their best behavior. Need help with a bag or stroller? Ask anyone. Are you holding a sleeping toddler? Here, take my seat instead. Did you want our Fastpasses to Test Track? We can't use them but don't want them to go to waste. Are you crabby because you're hot, but you still want to go on this ride, but only the second half, because your daughter will get scared on the first half? Here, I'm a High-Ranking Cast Member. I'll get you into the second half only. Did your waitress at Akershus just spill drinks all over your lap? When you get back to your room we'll have flowers on the table and we'll credit $50 to your room to pay for your ruined clothing.

3. Everyone talks to everyone else. I'm referring to the ease of conversation here. We once met a nice older man, visiting the Disney Studios by himself, who had fought in WWII and was on the beach at Normandy on D-Day. It's so easy to strike up conversations with people you've never met.

4. It's safe. My sister and I were all over the World (buses, monorails, rides) at 12 and 15 years of age without any problems. If your kids do get lost, the Cast Members have an EXTENSIVE system to return them to you within a few minutes.

5. The ability to escape from your "real" world. Your whole life is "real." You deal with "real" all the time. At WDW you just don't have to. It's clean, beautiful, happy...add your positive adjectives here.

6. WDW works very hard to create atmosphere and ambience throughout the whole enormous property. For example: If you enter the Magic Kingdom at the park's opening and listen to the music playing, you'll notice that it's upbeat, exciting, happy. By the end of the day, when you're tired and ready to relax, you'll hear softer, smoother, slower music that matches your mood. The closer you look, the more you see the physical details, like the extensive (and outrageously varied) landscaping, or the small details in a ride that give it depth. The garbage cans are even matched to the decor of the park or land they're in - Adventureland's trash cans resemble bamboo, Epcot's Future World cans are futuristic (one of them talks to you!).

7. The rides are fun. I didn't fall in love with WDW because of rides but they are good. They DO NOT compare, at all, to rides at any other amusement park. In fact, WDW is NOT an amusement park. Michigan's Adventure, Cedar Point, etc., are all about thrill rides, really, while WDW's rides are first about story. It's a Small World isn't much in terms of a ride (you sit in a slow moving boat on a track) but the displays around you are beautiful and detailed. However, they do have thrill rides that pack a punch. The Twilight Zone Tower of Terror is a case in point. It's not just a free fall; it's a free fall, then another, then another. Or the Rock 'n Roller Coaster with Aerosmith - count me in for ANY ride featuring Aerosmith music.

8. It's beautiful. Everywhere. There is NO ugliness in the whole place. (That guests can see, anyway.)

9. There is so much to do. This might be a problem if you've never been before and want to do everything in one visit, but since I've been several times now, I don't feel the pressure to do it all. We take a break in the afternoon to nap, read, swim by the pool, and then go back to the parks in the evening. There are also things like waterskiing, parasailing, golfing, tennis, fishing, etc. to try that I've never had time for yet. Maybe someday.

I'm not sure if I'm in love with WDW because it's become a hobby, or if it's because I have so many great memories from there, or because I need psychotherapy. But I get thrills there when...

I walk onto Main Street in the Magic Kingdom. My chest feels like it will burst.

I see Helena's reaction to It's a Small World.

I am there with my family and we're having fun without telephones, computers, or interruptions - just us and families like us.


I do know that I am only this passionate about a few things: My family, the gospel, WDW, maybe one or two others. Unfortunately, this is an expensive passion. With good planning I've never NOT enjoyed a trip to WDW, even when it was hot and humid, or had to stand in lines. Even though there are always lots of people at WDW, I have experienced a lot of quiet and peaceful times (during the least busy times of year).

Holly, it's probably not the typical vacation that your family has been on. (Dan empathized with Nathan's ideas about just buying a camper instead!) But it also isn't ANYTHING like any amusement park you've been to before. (This is not a week at Deer Park Funland.) Your two older kids will remember most of it, and your youngest will remember more than you think. If you decide to go and you plan it well, I think I can promise you'll have a great time. You can probably go at any time - in 3 years, in 5 years, next year - and there will be good experiences no matter what. I'm not a great fan of Florida itself, but there's nothing like driving from MI to FL in the winter...it's like slowly entering paradise. It gets warmer and greener with each passing state, and all of a sudden there are orange groves and Spanish moss everywhere you look. And then at the end of your journey through the Midwest, to the Appalachians, to the honest-to-goodness South, you're at the Happiest Place on Earth!

Sorry I couldn't be a touch more pithy in my answer to Why I Love Disney World!

Cookie Thoughts

Tonight I was making cookies because...well...fine, I have no reason. (They are so good, though. I'm noticing that WAY too much of my eating happens after dark! Anyway...) But while I was making them I had a thought: Even though the dough could have been mixed a little better before I started putting dollops of dough on the cookie sheet, every cookie STILL had a chocolate chip in it. In fact, they all had a least a few. That's just like us, isn't it? Particularly during our teenage years, we start to think that we don't have any defining qualities, or unique characteristics, or worthy traits. The truth is, we ALL have chocolate chips inside of us.

It's 10:30pm. What did you expect?

On Sunday at church, I was walking down the hall with Helena, on our way to meet Dan and Hunter, and she noticed a picture of Jesus on the wall and said, "Mom, he's what we pray about!" Indeed.

Here's another Deep Thought for you: When we were painting Helena's room, we decided to make it a two-tone purple rather than just one deeper shade. We decided to just take the darker shade and mix it with some white paint until it was exactly the right (slightly lighter) shade that would be complementary. While this was going on, Dan said (and this is probably obvious, but since he's an art major and I am kind of art-phobic, it was news to me): "No matter how small the amount of color we add to this white paint, once we add it, we can never make it white again. It will always have a slight tint." Get ready for Analogy Time now: Isn't that just like our lives? Once we sin, WE can never make our lives perfectly white again. No amount of apologizing or good works or even childbearing can make up for the sins we commit. That's why it's such an incredible miracle that the Savior CAN and DOES and HAS made up for all of our sins, shortcomings, and mistakes. Isn't that exciting?

Some good books I've read lately:

Animal, Vegetable, Miracle by Barbara Kingsolver
My Life in France by Julia Child with Alex Purd'homme


Good books I'm going to read:

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling. Hallelujah!!! (Except when I finish it I'll likely be crying over it, and additionally depressed that there's no more to look forward to.)

And thanks for all the birthday wishes yesterday! I had a pretty good day, and a fun family birthday party that evening featuring cake decorated by Helena. (It was very symmetrical: princess crowns and wands all lined up, candles standing straight as soldiers.)

Ravages of Aging

Today Caity and I each brought our two kids along with my other nephew, Aidan, to my sister's nursing home (she's the activities director) to participate in a children's parade. The residents really seemed to enjoy having little kids and babies to talk to and coo at, and the kids were happy to get free balloons and eat cookies.

But I couldn't help but be sad. My sister's worked with the elderly since her graduation from college almost 10 years ago, and she loves her job, loves working with people who have Alzheimer's and dementia, loves taking care of people that the rest of society would rather forget. Hey, she's not perfect, but work like this is what secures your place in heaven. The sadness came from the illness, the deformity, the cloudy minds of the once-vibrant people around me. None of us can escape getting older. We can hope that modern medicine will save us from the symptoms, or hope that we die quickly without suffering from chronic illness. But ultimately aging occurs, and I'm grateful that there are people like Andrea who will really love me even when I'm almost not "me" anymore.

Speaking of aging - I'm 28 years old today. We had a party at my aunt's house and I was able to read in my grandma's journal about the day I was born. My mom soldiered through, and almost died giving birth to me, and I was small at 5lbs and 13oz (I grew!) - Grandma was afraid to hold me for fear I might break. She said Andrea seemed to know what was going on and was pleased. (Her feelings about that varied over the years, I'm sure!). I'm glad to be here now, with so much of my family near.

And even more unbelievable - in 10 more years, I'll be 38. Wow.

Running Fool - or Foolish Runner?

Probably both.

But I did Day 2 of my running plan today. I almost laughed out loud, but I kept going. Tonight I decided to try and walk faster during the walking intervals but not push it too much with the running. It went okay, and I'm glad I did it. Sorry if I'm making too big a deal of this, but to me it IS a big deal. I've never done any running, although I have done some regular exercise in the past. (I ate some chocolate covered pretzels when I got home, though, thereby nullifying the whole deal. Nice.)

Speaking of exercise, I'm watching "Spanglish" - that Adam Sandler movie with Tea Leoni in it. She regularly practices yoga in real life, and she whipped out some fabulous yoga move in the movie and I was like - "WHOA!" She was holding herself up with, let us say, two fingers while holding her legs parallel to the floor. I like yoga because it's relaxing, but I can not even imagine being able to do that.

Last night we went to a family get-together with our cousins (Dan's cousin Ben and his wife Lisa just had a baby). It was so nice - really pleasant weather, great company, loving family - and their daughter is absolutely beautiful. When you see a tiny little baby like that you almost forget that babies start out that small. Hunter seems gigantic in proportion. I guess he is kind of big for his age, but still...this is not always a blessing, because I go through two sizes a season with these kiddos.

My stepdad, David, always reminds me (in jest) that the Bible says that women are saved in their childbearing. (And WHERE is that reference???) I'd love to know - how many kids must one have to cover one's sins? And, is one Helena worth 3 or 4 kids? If they don't sleep at night, do you get extra points? And what if you do something totally insensitive during their teen years that they never forget? All I know is, I love children...my own most of all. There were so many kids running around last night, it just made me so thrilled, in a deep-hearted kind of way.

One more movie thought: "Cinderella III" sounds like a nightmare, right? Like, you would never watch this movie out of your own free will and choice. Well, my mom (who has a Disney movie club membership) purchased the aforementioned movie, and incredibly, I watched it with Helena. Hey - it wasn't that bad. Once I got past my initial horror of sequels for their own sake, I didn't hate it. There were a few funny moments, some not too horrible music.

To my heroes, Dan and Joel, the Masters of the Roof: You did an incredible work today. Let it rain, let it pour, let the wind blow, let the sun beat down, and you will STILL finish that thing! I'm constantly amazed at the quantity and quality of work you two do together. Thank you for working so hard this weekend.

Another Big Idea

Every so often, I get a Big Idea. Occasionally they're doable - usually they become pleasant, somewhat outrageous memories. Today my Big Idea is that I am going to start running. I've never run before, because I have congenitally gimpy feet - Symptomatic Tarsal Nevicular, for those of you taking notes - which basically means my ankles are super-pronated and I was born with one extra bone in each of my feet. After my senior year of high school I had the left one removed. It didn't help much. Plus, and this is no small issue (literally), there's the unhappy vision of what I must look like running. Oh, don't try to picture it. Think of something else. And I hate the feeling that I can't breathe, oh, I'm dying, ouch, more sweat, how do people do this???

So, despite the obvious challenges, I am going to try. If people hike Mount Everest blind, or with no legs, surely I can run a little bit.

I found a plan online that sounds easy in practice called the Couch-to-5K Running Plan. It involves increasingly difficult intervals of walking and running that ultimately ends up in running for about 25 minutes. I tried it for the first time last night. (As close to dark as possible, naturally!). At first it wasn't so bad - I was running at a not-embarrassing pace and didn't have side stitches or unbearable knee pain. As I went on, though, it was harder. By the last running interval my feet barely left the pavement. It was embarrassingly slow. But my goal wasn't to whip around like an Olympic sprinter; I just wanted to actually COMPLETE the program for the day. And I did. Yep, my knees had a hard time dragging me upstairs to bed, and my back sort of hurt, but I can walk and function. Hooray! I do the same rotation tomorrow.

And if I ever DO become a "runner" (take that, Mr. Orthopedic Surgeon!), I will run the Walt Disney World Half Marathon. NOT the regular one, because let's face it, 26+ miles?

On a related note: I have discovered (to my chagrin) chocolate-covered pretzels. How did these remain hidden from me for so long? They are delicious, and less than 30% fat. Ed Wasiura says manna tasted like my grandmother's Parker House rolls. I say it tasted exactly like chocolate-covered pretzels. This point of doctrine is open for speculation.

More pictures

A few more, just for fun!

Love that Helena with wind in her hair! She and Ga-ga are like two peas in a pod. 57 years are no separation for those two!

Summer Fun

I don't really have much to say, but I do have some pictures to speak for me. Yesterday evening, while I was "out with the girls" (and Hunter), Helena and Dan went fishing with my Mom and David. Helena had a BLAST. In a way I wish I could have seen it...Thank goodness for cameras. She actually caught two fish! There are also a couple of humorous Hunter photos - one where he and Bennie were sharing the stroller, another where he was attempting to eat his toes. I added in a 4th of July picture...Helena spent the almost the entire time just running around in Ga-ga's big backyard.

Also, today we went to the Nelson Family Reunion at my cousin (well, first cousin twice removed, actually) Marilyn's home. Too bad we didn't get any pictures. She has a large piece of property with plenty of room to run around, lots of chairs and picnic tables, a fire pit and swimming pool. Even though our attendance seems to drop every year, we had a nice time. We hardly see each other outside of this reunion, but today the older members of the family shared some stories with me that I'd never heard before. I'm interested in all things genealogical, so that was neat for me. One funny story: I have an older relative (some of you may know her, if you're in my ward - she's our bishop's mom) named Doris who is, what, 70? 75? years old. She wears a wig, and tries hard to look "young," but after a certain point that's pretty hard. Anyway, today she was describing the TWO men who are currently after her - one who's local, the other from Sweden. We really had her going. Apparently she was engaged, long ago (in her younger days), but decided to ditch him and move to California, where all the handsome, available, exciting young me were. She said she was one of the first people she ever knew to "take matters into her own hands" and "follow her heart." So funny, but kind of sweet. Of all the things in our lives that we'll all look back on, and hope we did our best for, FAMILY will be the most significant item on our lists.

In My Little Town

There are so many reasons I love living in a small town. Everything is a pleasant stroll or bike ride away from home. We have our own post office, library, our choice of parks, excellent school district (I have to say that; I'm an alumnus), beautiful lakes, a grocery store, video store, pizza parlor..."North Muskegon - We've Got it ALL!" But it goes way beyond just what's in the town itself...

Our next-door neighbors have been out of town for about a week. They're both schoolteachers and they often go on extended vacations during the summer. They've asked us in the past to take care of their house (get the mail, etc.) but hadn't approached us this time. Anyway, this morning Dan noticed that their backyard sprinklers had been running continuously since at least yesterday - an expensive problem as they, like us, depend on city water to run their sprinkler system. Dan had to go to work so he left it up to me to try and break into their house and turn off the sprinklers. I poked around, tried all the doors and windows, dug through the bushes for those fake rocks you can hide keys in - with no luck. Well, we aren't really close with these neighbors and I didn't have their phone number and didn't remember their last name (very unusual, I think of Polish origin) so I called City Hall. Our friendly clerk, Christy, helped me figure out their phone number but all I could do was leave a message. Just as I was debating whether I should have the city turn off their water at the street, Christy called back and gave me the names and numbers of some friends of our neighbors. I had to ask - how did Christy know who their friends were? Turns out she'd called Debbie (the elementary secretary at the school; the two neighbor girls attend N.M.) and just asked who the girls hang out with. SUPER LONG story not so short, I was able to call their friend (who also happened to be looking after the house while they were gone) and she came over to turn off the sprinklers and save their super-soaked yard. That's small-town life. (Of course, we could be better friends to our neighbors and obtain their cell phone number, too.)

Here's one more:

When I was an elementary strings teacher at the aforementioned N.M. Elementary, I took my students on a field trip to the Frauenthal to see "Barrage," a modern string ensemble that incorporates music, dance, theatrics, etc. It was on a Sat. night, I think, and we had about 8 parents besides myself who were acting as chaperones, or who were just interested in seeing the show at a group rate. The show was great, but it ended a little sooner than we anticipated, and we arrived back at the school that night about 30 minutes before the parents were supposed to show up and take their kids. It was kind of cold - too cold to wait outside - and I didn't have a building key. Instead of trying to call each kid's parent, the other 8 chaperones and I just divided up the kids and brought them home - no big deal. Now, how many places in the world would you feel comfortable having random parents bring your kids home? I guess they aren't really "random" parents - everybody at least knows one another's names, even if they aren't friends. But you see what I mean.

Ever since I was a kid growing up here, our neighbors have always become our friends. Some more than others, obviously, but we at least know a little about each other, and there's an unspoken trust here. You don't have to worry, really, about the people around you - It's a comfort. You can go ahead and commit a crime, but everybody knows it's you, and they might call your Mom.

Plus, this place is beautiful. I know it might be suffocating for some people - I have one friend in particular who lives in New York City and says that Chicago is too "midwestern" - but it's perfect for me and a great place for my kiddos to grow up. Come see us!

Beth's Got Talent???

I'm a little embarrassed to admit my recent "addiction" to "America's Got Talent." Really, by addiction I just mean that I pay attention to when it's on and watch it with interest. I was disgusted when they voted Boy Shakira through, elated that they agreed with me on Cas Haley. While sharing my favorites with Dan on YouTube I came across the "Britain's Got Talent" winner, Paul Potts. This guy has a gift. He has the kind of vocal talent (opera, specifically) that I really believe can only come from above. It can improve with work and training but unlike some things, if you aren't born with it, you can't create it.

This got me to thinking. I'm not so sure I have a talent like that - just a pure, unadulterated talent. On the one hand, if I do, I'm unaware of it, which is a good thing - can't get too prideful there! On the other hand, I wish I did know, because maybe it would lend me some confidence.

After a lot of thought I decided that I can pray about what gifts I have and ask for gifts I want. Spiritual gifts, not "stuff." And I can develop one gift that everybody can have, and that's charity and the ability to love people without reserve.

Today Dan had the day off and the kids were (finally) feeling better, so we went to the Grandville mall, rode on the carousel, cruised the escalator ("elligator"), and watched "Ratatouille." I know a lot of people take their small kids to movies but after today, I don't believe I'll be one of them. To begin with, the movie was so loud it freaked Hunter out (and he's not touchy at all - a more laid-back baby there never was). It even bothered Helena, the Queen of Loudness. Then Hunter had a poopy diaper, but the restrooms did NOT feature ANY changing facilities - not even a stretch of counter to put him on. I balanced him gingerly between two sinks and worked fast to avoid any wiggles straight into the sinks. Eventually, after about an hour of nursing him in the van, walking around the mall, and praying for peace, he fell asleep. Helena also fell asleep after about an hour. The movie was...okay. I might have enjoyed it more if I weren't so distracted. Plus, can movies be more expensive? Even the matinee price was outrageous.


That being said, Dan and I will be going on our first kid-free date in a while to see "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix" when it comes out. I hope it doesn't disappoint, but then, I'm pretty forgiving when it comes to Harry.

But, Helena had a great time. It's amazing how she finds fun in free, or almost-free, things. We rode the carousel, as I mentioned earlier, and she sat on her horse and waved to her "audience" the whole time. I was cracking up. Then I noticed this older guy taking pictures of her. I was, naturally, weirded out over this until after I saw him talking with Dan. Turns out this guy had his wife with him, in a wheelchair, and they had never been able to have kids. His wife thought Helena was just so cute and wanted to have some pictures to remember it. Dan gave them the go-ahead. (We used to have more experiences like this. For example, when Helena was around a year old, we had dinner at a local Chinese restaurant, and the Chinese waitress wanted to get a picture of Helena on her cell phone. I think that blond curls are a novelty for most Chinese people, where smooth dark hair reigns. It was funny.)

The day before she was having fun with Dan in the front yard. They were sitting on the curb, each holding a stick (their "Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo" sticks) and changing each other into various animals and monsters. Then they laid back and cloud-gazed for awhile. It was one of those moments that will flash through my mind when Helena's accepting her diploma or putting on her wedding dress. I can't believe how much I love her.

Same thing with Hunter. He's been so congested (which comes easily since he has such a wee little nose!) but he tries to be happy anyway. Last night he was nursing and I just made a little raspberry-ish noise in his ear, and he started laughing, hard, out loud - he was laughing too much to nurse, and then waiting in anticipation for me to do it again! Every time, without fail, that he wakes up, he looks over and smiles at me. Every single time. What can you do with kids like this? I just hand them my heart and go on with our day.

Time to pick up the house! Thanks for stopping by.